What Is a Normal Relationship Supposed to Be Like? The Real Truth

We’ve all sat across from our partner and thought, what is a normal relationship supposed to be like? Are we in a normal relationship?

But now you’re here, so, you’ve finally caught on to things. If you ask yourself, what is a normal relationship supposed to be like, it’s time you found out.

Ignore the TV shows, ignore your family and friends’ relationships, because now it’s time to focus just on you and your relationship. Once you evaluate whether or not your relationship is healthy, it’s then time to do something about it. But let’s not jump ahead. For now, you just need to figure out if this relationship is something you should be in or not.

What is a normal relationship supposed to be like?

After growing up watching reality TV and romantic comedies, it affects your perception of what’s normal. If you also have parents who argued or are divorced, you may not have had the chance to witness a healthy relationship. [Read: Understanding the vital components to what makes a good relationship]

What happens is you end up in similar relationships because this is what you know. Now, I’m not blaming you. In fact, I’ve been in my fair share of unhealthy relationships, and it took me years to figure out that they were actually unhealthy. Maybe you’re now in the same position that I was in years ago.

If so, you’re slowly realizing that maybe your relationship isn’t actually as healthy as you thought. It’s time you found out what is a normal relationship supposed to be like.

#1 You feel better. When we’re with someone we love, life is still happening around us. What I mean is that you’re going to have good and bad days, but when you’re with a partner who’s supportive and kind, those bad days don’t seem as hard to go through because you have someone by your side the entire time. You feel better when you’re around them and don’t feel alone. [Read: 20 signs you’ve met the love of your life]

#2 You invest in the relationship. This works both ways. A truly healthy relationship is when both people are putting in an effort to make the relationship work. If you’re the one doing all the work while they’re reaping the benefits, that’s not a healthy relationship. A relationship is a two-way street and both people need to want to drive down the road together. No one said it’s going to be easy, but you both need to want to do it. [Read: 12 very real signs of true, unending love in a relationship]

#3 You have shared goals. Usually, when you’re in a casual relationship, you’re not really planning anything long-term with this person because you don’t really care. If they’re with you in a year, great, if not, whatever. But in a healthy relationship, you both are planning your futures around one another. You’re basically moving forward as a team, not just on your own.

#4 The chemistry is on. Yeah, screw science we’re talking about good old sexual chemistry. A healthy relationship is one which is full of chemistry between both people. Of course, you’re going to have your days where you’re feeling down or not sexual, but overall, you feel sexual attraction towards your partner. If you don’t want to have sex with them because you find them revolting, well, that’s a problem. [Read: How to tell if there’s serious chemistry between two people]

#5 You recover from a fight the right way. When you’re in a relationship, you’re going to fight whether you want to or not. It doesn’t matter how great you two are together, fights are going to happen. But what is a huge difference between a healthy and unhealthy relationship is how you recover from a fight.

Healthy and normal relationships are able to bond after a fight and communicate effectively, not just by yelling and ignoring each other for days on end. A healthy couple talks about the fight and works on repairing the issue.

#6 It’s not like other relationships you’ve had. In the past, maybe you had a couple casual relationships but this one is different. Why? Because this isn’t about only getting what you want from it, this is based on you supporting each other and bringing out the best in one another. That’s what makes this different than the others. You have a feeling that this is genuine and selfless love.

#7 You share opinions without fear. Usually, people are nervous to tell their partner opinions which they may not agree with. But the thing is, this is what makes a couple stronger and healthier. You should be able to voice your opinion in front of your partner and talk about it. Regardless of the opinion, you need to feel comfortable to speak your mind. [Read: The 15 phases of a healthy relationship]

#8 You decide together. You’re in a relationship, so it’s not just about you anymore. Now, you make decisions together. Sure, you may not get exactly what you want, but that’s not the point. Making a decision with your partner isn’t about getting your way, it’s about teamwork and seeking the best solution for the both of you.

#9 You have your own life. I know this may sound counterproductive but a healthy and normal relationship doesn’t mean you’re with your partner every day, all day long. No, a healthy relationship is about having your own personal time, doing things which you love while also spending time with them as well. You both need your own time to see friends, family, or just watch a movie alone.

#10 You show affection. Yes, sex is important, but you know what’s even more important? The little things. This means kissing your partner when you wake up in the morning or taking care of them when they’re sick. Of course, they should be doing these small things for you because it shows you they care. The small acts of kindness show what a healthy relationship is all about. [Read: The 25 sweetest romantic gestures for everyday life]

#11 You talk to your partner. But you actually talk to each other. When you’re angry, you talk to them, not to your parents or friends. This is what makes a huge difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships. If you can talk to them and not rely on other people when a conversation gets tough then that’s healthy.

#12 You feel safe. I cannot express the importance of this. Your relationship should be your safe zone, the place where you can turn to if you want to talk and feel open. You need stability in your relationship, so if you don’t feel that you can be your own person, then the relationship isn’t safe for you. [Read: The hidden dangers of uncertainty in a relationship]

#13 It feels right. I know this may sound a bit corny. but deep down, you know when something is and isn’t right. If they’re treating you poorly, you know it’s not right. Now, you have your reasons for staying with this person, but you already know that the relationship isn’t something you deserve.

[Read: The 9 relationship stages all couples have to go through]

So, what is a normal relationship supposed to be like? It’s time you looked at the signs and evaluated the relationship you’re in.

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